I can't be powerless...
I am a Director of sales. Or a Vice-President or any other high up the business food chain title. I have effectively made it in the business world. I have competed, survived and excelled against others around me. Some have done better, some have moved on. I make good money, have a nice car. live in an almost paid for house and have been away with my family enjoying warm salt air and beaches or bright sunshine and fresh powder. All outward appearances are that life is good.
But I still wake up in the morning, having struggled the night away trying to quiet that little voice that is tell me its all over soon.
Not only is that client not going to sign the deal, they are going to wholesale change to my competitor and tell my boss its all my fault. I'll lose my job, never find another one, I'll be banned from job boards, blackballed from industries, lose my house, my family will leave. I'll be the laughing stock of the business world. Arrrgh, just let me sleep!
Now that may be extreme, it may be that you wake wondering what you forgot to put in the proposal. As you are driving to a sales call, you fret that the presentation is not what they asked for. Your mind wanders in sales meetings hoping that you will not be called for anything other than the numbers you have to supply. When you are at home your head is at work. When you are at work, you want to be elsewhere. A few extra minutes at the gym becomes a second night of hockey with the guys or one extra round of golf with a client.
Focus becomes an issue here. I direct my attention to issues that are not a part of what I am presently doing. In fact I turn my sights to efforts that distract me from current situation. I study my investment portfolio instead of calling clients. I sit in the lobby with my iPad rather than the audience of my daughters dance competition. I spend hours on the phone with clients while on vacation at my parents Florida home.
Why, what is this distraction process about. Can I not simply be present to whats going on around me?
These examples and more are simply the symptoms of personal powerlessness. And these manifestations become more pervasive as we age if we do not recognize the problem and address it. This is due to the reinforcing nature of our actions. Over the course of our lives we experience a level of failure do to our own action or inaction. If this happens once its quickly forgotten. But let it happen occasional over a period of time it begins to reinforce within us that we are NOT capable. Once this takes hold deep within our psyche it starts the self-fulfilling prophesy ball rolling eventually replacing confidence with doubt.
We begin to question our actions, past and future. Rather than dwell on the results of these questions we find outlets of distraction. These outlet further reinforce the doubt and we question anew. It may become debilitating or as with most, its a small issue dealt with by a trip to the doctor and an SSRI prescription. Problem solved! Or is it? Are the symptoms the issue or is it the underlying issue we truly do not want to face. That there is a lack of power in my life.
I am powerless...